Brush With 'Covid'

The last 3-4 years have been quite a wild ride of growing and learning as a person and as a Christian. Some of the story has been beautiful, some has been beyond painful but through it all God has been by my side. I wanted to capture just a few of the highlights before I get into the most recent story. Just over three years ago I was living a life that I thought I would carry out to my old age and could see it stretch out before me very clearly. The truth was that nearly everyone I knew and everyone around me was pretending to be something they were not. I learned that the whole family that I was so deeply involved with was covering up deep dark secrets. (read my post on divorce ) The support I thought I had, crumbled away and disappeared like dust when the truth came out. I thank God everyday that the truth did come out after only 7 years instead of 70! As painful as it may be, I am so grateful for that experience. I learned that I was naive and that I had judged other people harshly when I didn’t know their whole story. I was also given three of the greatest gifts that I could ever receive. I was told by doctors when I was around 18 years old that I would not be able to have children due to my PCOS. I had 3 babies in under 3 years. God used them to give me the Mama Bear strength to get out of that life we were living and get them to a safe place.

The next miracle was meeting my husband Travis. We met online and meeting him was like meeting my best friend. We met and married the year before the pandemic shut everything down. I’m so thankful for him and his support and love for me. His God given respect for me as his wife and his protection for my children is a breath of fresh air. I didn’t think marriage like this was possible and I don’t think I would be so appreciative of him if I hadn’t had my past experiences.

We lost our first baby in December of 2019 at just 10 weeks gestation. I had some retained tissue and 5 days later I was hemorrhaging so badly that I should have died. I lost half my blood in about 20-30 minutes ( Read Here: 12-19-19) I should have passed out, I should have gone into systematic shock and died. I was conscious the entire time. I was not afraid, I was calm and that was not my own strength or my own mind, it was the Holy Spirit sustaining me in that moment. I think if I had been panicked my blood loss would have been much faster and I may not have made it. Christmas morning of 2019 was spent in a hospital room. Sadness was still at the edges but in that moment I was so thankful to be alive to see my children and my husband again. We have also been in several near death experiences on the Highways between Moscow and Spokane. Split seconds from people passing when they shouldn’t and if it weren’t for Travis’ God given quick reflexes we should have died several times over. There was the time that I was supposed to receive Chemotherapy for a pregnancy complication. Travis and I both felt that was not what God wanted me to do. I was so strongly opposed to putting poison in my body as a preventative measure for what I “might” have. I did a 5 day fast and at the end of it my body had reached the blood levels that the doctors were looking for. I still underwent surgery and the tissue they removed was not what they feared it was.

(Read Here: miscarriage-3) Most recently God has brought us through some of the darkest times yet. It all started in July of 2021, when I put our whole family on the GAPS diet. It is a healing protocol to help digestive issues and many others that I won’t go into right now. We all experienced some level of mild detox but overall were doing pretty well. One night in July, Travis came down with a fever. We thought it was some slightly more severe detox symptoms. We had had a camping trip planned. We were ready to go that morning and had to put it off since he felt so bad. He was shaking and sweating, hot then cold. Most times that I’d seen him sick it passed within 12 hours or so. We were a little disappointed that the camping trip was cancelled but figured we could make it out in the next week or two… (little did we know!) Around day three of an unrelenting fever Travis and I looked up ways to reduce detox die off symptoms, he took all sorts of things including charcoal and clay to bind the toxins and remove them from his body. He started getting dehydrated and couldn’t seem to keep water in his body. He was drinking an electrolyte solution of salt and potassium but it was not enough though. One early morning around 4 am a week or so after being sick I woke up to him calling for me. He was in the bedroom doorway and he was stumbling and reeling and he said, “ I can’t see!”. I went from a dead sleep to running across the room just in time to grab him. He fell backwards and I was only awkwardly able to slow his fall. His head made a loud thump on the floor and he just laid there. I called 911 and they came within about 5 minutes. He was able to sit up by the time they arrived and his blood pressure was very low. I think it was 90/50 or something. Someone as tall as Travis should have a higher than the average persons blood pressure of 120/80. The paramedics took him to the ER. My mom came later to stay with the girls so I could go see him. He was diagnosed with low sodium and they sent him home after pumping him full of fluids and more electrolytes.

The next couple days are a blur, Travis was so sick and I was getting sick too. I tried to get him anything I could think of to help him stay hydrated but nothing was helping. He finally started taking Ibuprofen to help get a break from the fever. I asked my Mom to take the girls for a few days since at this point we had wised up to the idea that this was NOT detox. I didn’t want them getting what he had and if I was going to get sick I wouldn’t be able to take care of them and Travis too. My mom looked at Travis and thought he looked awful, he was purple and gray and could hardly walk. It was more shocking to her since she hadn’t seen him everyday. I felt so helpless to do anything for him. The Dr. did call and let us know that his Covid test came back positive. The next morning around 6 am Travis passed out again, thankfully I was able to see it coming and he sat down on the floor instead of falling. I waited for him to recover a bit and took him to the ER. By the grace of God we made it down the stairs and to the car. At the ER I sat with him and he was not really with it. Half asleep/ half awake… I was watching the monitors and could see that his blood pressure was still pretty low. I was hoping that we could get more salt and go but at the same time I knew he was sick and getting sicker and we were probably not leaving anytime soon. Travis is pretty healthy now but his lungs are not as strong as they could have been due to many years of smoking as a younger man. I was looking at the monitors and realized that what I thought was his heart rate was actually his oxygen level. It was about 88% to 86% which is not good. No one was coming in to talk to us though and I told myself that if it got to 85% I would yell for somebody. Finally a nurse came in with an oxygen mask and put it on Travis. It helped but not as much as I would have liked to see. His oxygen was only maintaining in the low 90’s. The Dr. came in and said that he was going to be admitting Travis to the hospital. That was the last thing either of us wanted to hear. The reality of what was happening hit me and I wondered if he would come home at all. I was praying for strength and that my husband would be able to leave the hospital soon. I only had my purse and phone with me and I was not going to leave until I knew what was going on. I didn’t want to leave and I didn’t know if I was going to be able to go with him. The nurse told me that I would be allowed to stay with him in his room if I did not leave his quarantine room in the hospital. I immediately said “okay!” They seemed shocked and said it would be at least 5 days. I said that was fine. My girls were getting a summer vacation with Grandma and Papa and my husband needed me. It was simple really. I’m so thankful that my girls were with my mom and I was able to be there. I probably would not have been allowed in later and I don’t think the story would have the same ending if I had not been with him. We were sent up to a quarantined room and spent the day figuring out the hospital protocol and what to expect. They put him on Remdesivir an Antiviral, steroids as well as an anti bacterial, vitamin D, C and Zinc too. He was also placed on high flow oxygen that helped get his oxygen level to a much better 95% saturation. Travis’ CT scan showed pneumonia in his lungs and they told him he had a blood clot so they put him on a blood thinner. The nurses told him that he had a good chance of survival and he would probably go home. The level of fear most of the nurses had was palpable. Most wouldn’t come in unless they had complete PPE gear. One nurse came in with no protective equipment not even a mask and she had no fear. Travis and I are both convinced she must have been an angel. The doctor said that he was going to do Remdesivir for a 5 day cycle then re-evaluate Travis' condition. We were in better spirits and just focused on getting through the next 5 days. The Dr. said it can cause liver problems in some people. I was able to have some things dropped off at the main entrance of the hospital and nurses brought them to me. My mom brought me clean clothes and the basics for 5 days. The days really blur together. I had the wool blanket that i’m crocheting for Travis with me and I spent many hours working on that while listening to podcasts and some old t.v. shows on my phone that don’t really need watching, just listening. Travis’ high flow oxygen was so loud it permeated everything. He was not able to really sleep during the first couple days. He was not super aware but not completely out of it either. We couldn't talk much because he couldn't talk without feeling out of breath. I didn’t know what to do other than just be there. I prayed a lot, prayed we would leave together. Thankfully his fever did go away on the 3rd day, however the antiviral was making his blood sugar go crazy high so they had to put him on insulin. With the constant interruptions of medical staff coming and going it was hard for Travis to relax. I was able to sit on his bed on the 3rd or 4th day to give some comfort and familiarity and he was able to sleep for about an hour. The days all blur together, the constant in and out of nurses and staff, food, sleep, prayer. Thankfully I was able to sleep and I was pretty sick but no one seemed to mind since we were both quarantined it didn’t matter. I was not as sick but sitting in the room was probably what my body actually needed at the time.

Around day 4 and 5 the Dr. started to get concerned about Travis’ liver function. He didn’t get his 5th dose of Remdesivir because his body was not doing well on it. On the 5th day I was crocheting as usual in the bony recliner (that was also my bed.) I noticed that the oxygen was lower than it had been. It was maintaining at about 88% if it dipped lower the machine would beep loudly and only stop when it got back up to 88-89%. I was keeping an eye on it and finally decided to call the nurse in. The respiratory therapist came in a few minutes later and bumped up his oxygen. Instead of increasing his oxygen actually decreased. In just about 20 minutes he went from a moderate amount of oxygen to a very high dose. We were told he was going to be sent to the ICU since his oxygen needs went up so dramatically. A nurse who we’d never seen before came in and told Travis that he was dying and that he needed to take this seriously. He told her she was not helpful and that she was just increasing the anxiety and that was not helping anyone. The Dr. came in and Travis told him that he wanted Ivermectin. The Dr. actually jumped on the idea and said he could do that for him. He also asked if I had seen anything else I thought would help. He told me that he is not allowed to offer Ivermectin and can only do certain things on request of the patient due to the covid protocol policies in place. He told me he felt like his hands were tied. (The other thing I wanted to mention is that Ivermectin is a common medication in hospitals, they carried it in their pharmacy. It is not just a medicine that you only find in a pet store.) While we were waiting to go to the ICU room we both broke down and cried and held each other for a while. The reality of death was very close, I knew that we were not immune to pain and death. God does not promise us an easy road. I didn’t want him to go yet, Travis and I are just getting started on our 90 years together. It seemed like the protocol the hospital put him on was making him worse and the more I’ve seen it seems that the protocol makes people sicker not better. The ICU room was even more claustrophobic than the first room. It was dark and it felt like we were fighting more than just a virus. It felt like a battle between good and evil. Travis had a hard day the first day in the ICU the possibility of death so close and regrets of not living every moment to the fullest were close at hand. He fought though and I could see a change in him, a humbling and a clinging to God and His promises and goodness. The next morning Travis was given his 1st dose of 18 mg of Ivermectin. His oxygen needs never increased in the ICU. In just a few hours he was feeling better than he had. Not great but better. He was talking more and making an attempt at his dry dark humor that most of the nurses didn’t quite get. After his second dose of Ivermectin they started lowering his oxygen intake. He was off the high flow oxygen and onto a simple nasal cannula. During the night they turned off all his oxygen flow and he was breathing room air. That morning he was discharged. We were both elated to be leaving the hospital. Travis had lost 30lbs in the 2 or 3 weeks that he was sick. He couldn’t walk without turning gray but he was home! They sent him home with 3 more doses of Ivermectin and the new Dr. that discharged Travis made sure to let us know that Ivermectin was not used to treat covid 19 and that he only prescribed it because we requested it. He was much less helpful than the first Dr.. We could see with our own eyes the miracle that happened in less than 48 hours off of the hospital's protocol. I know this is a hot topic and I am just relating our very real and close experience with “covid”. As we were leaving the hospital we saw the nurse that 2 days earlier told Travis he was going to die, she looked shocked and said, “ glad to see you are doing so well”. The darkness in the hospital was palpable. I don’t think that the protocol is set up to help people. I think a lot of the nurses have good hearts and are doing their best but there is a lot of misinformation. I’m thankful that God showed us what Travis needed and that he was able to walk out of that hospital in spite of everything. He told me of the darkness he felt, he said covid felt like more of a spiritual warfare than physical. That all he could think of was the name of Jesus and everything else seemed dark and jumbled in his mind. I’m thankful that my husband is coming back from this. It’s been over a month since he’s been out and he is still recovering. One nurse said it would be about 5 days for every day that he was sick. That seems to be on par with where we are at now. I don’t know what battles and experiences God has in store for us but I know our faith in Him has grown exponentially these last 3 years. We are both reminded that this world is more than just living and dying. There is a spiritual world happening all around us if we can just open our eyes and see. The belief that God is working in our lives is stronger than ever, I can’t wait to see my 4 children in heaven but I can’t help but think that God has more in store for us here.